Parent coaching
Practical strategies for your child’s behaviour, and the inner work that lets you actually use them.
You already know what to do. What is missing is what happens inside you in the two seconds before you respond.
You have read the books. You have tried the gentle parenting scripts. You know what you are supposed to say when your child hits, screams, refuses, or melts down in the grocery store, and somehow in the moment it leaves you entirely and you end up yelling again. This is not a knowledge problem. Parent coaching here explores practical strategies for your child’s behaviour, and the inner work that lets you actually use them.
You have read the books, but you’re still feeling lost.
Not a checklist to pass or fail. Just the shapes this tends to take, in case it helps to see them named.
Your child hits, bites, screams, or refuses, and nothing you have tried is landing.
You have read the gentle parenting books.
Your child’s behaviour is still defiant and uncooperative, and you are starting to wonder what you are doing wrong.
You know exactly how you want to respond.
In the moment, it leaves you, and you yell.
You are worried that if this is not nipped in the bud, the behaviour will spiral.
You are afraid of damaging your relationship with your child, or of your child being afraid of you.
You want strategies that fit your actual child, not a method designed for a child you do not have.
You want to stop repeating what was done to you, without knowing what to put in its place.
Your child’s behaviour is not a verdict on your parenting. There is almost always more than one thing contributing to it.
What this might feel like
In their own words. Some of what parents say, before they have a name for it.
I know what I am supposed to do. In the moment I forget, and I just end up yelling.
I have tried gentle parenting. It does not work with my kid, and now I feel like the problem is me.
I am turning into my dad, and I swore I never would.
How I work with parent coaching
We start with the actual behaviour. What is happening, when, how often, and what has already been tried. Children’s behaviour is rarely random, and it is rarely a verdict on your parenting. Often there are several things contributing at once: development, temperament, sleep, transitions, the dynamic in the room. We get specific, and you leave with strategies built for your child rather than a method borrowed from someone else’s.
Then we look at the part most parenting advice skips. The gap between knowing what to do and being able to do it in the moment is not a discipline problem. It is what gets activated in you when your child pushes exactly the button you did not know you had. Internal Family Systems for the parts of you that take over before your wise self can respond. Polyvagal-informed work for a nervous system that goes to threat faster than you would like. Attachment-aware perspective for the patterns you inherited about how children are supposed to behave, and what it means about you when they do not.
Gentle parenting gets talked about as a technique you apply to your child. I work with it differently: gently parenting the child within you, as you parent the child in front of you. The compassion you are trying to offer your child is usually the compassion you have never offered yourself, and that is the piece that makes the strategies hold.
Gently parenting the child within you, as you parent the child in front of you.
Practical details
Sessions and format
50-minute sessions, virtual across Ontario or in person Tuesdays in St. Agatha.
Virtual sessions across Ontario or in person in the Kitchener-Waterloo area. We can talk through which format fits your life on the consult call.
Fees and insurance
A receipt is provided for insurance reimbursement under Social Work Services, and many extended plans cover sessions. You confirm your coverage with your insurer.
For full details on session fees and payment, visit the Fees & Insurance page.
Every new client starts with a free 15-minute phone consultation. Once we have spoken, we will book a time that works for both of us. There is no obligation to continue.
Starting does not have to be complicated.
Book a free consult
A free 15-minute phone call. We talk about what is going on and whether we are the right fit. No obligation to continue.
Find your footing
Once we have spoken, we will book a time that works for both of us. The first sessions are slower and reflective; we get clear on what you are carrying.
Do the work, together
We work at the pace your nervous system can hold, and check in often about what is shifting and what you need next.
Frequently asked questions
It is both, and that is deliberate. You get practical strategy for what your child is doing, the way you would in coaching. You also get the therapeutic work underneath it, because the reason most parenting strategies fail is not the strategy. It is that you cannot reach it in the moment your child pushes the button. We work both ends at once, and how much weight each end carries depends on what you need.
No. This work happens with you. Children’s behaviour shifts most reliably when the adult in the room changes what they are bringing to it, and that is the piece we can actually work with. If it becomes clear your child would benefit from their own support, I will tell you plainly and help you find the right person.
No, and this is the most common frustration parents bring here. Gentle parenting is usually taught as a set of scripts to use on your child, which works right up until you are depleted, activated, or being pushed by the exact behaviour you find hardest. We use the same values, and we start somewhere different: with what happens in you first. Parents often find the scripts they already knew start working once that piece is in place.
Yes, where it is useful. You will leave sessions with concrete things to try, not just insight. What I will not do is hand you a template and send you off with it, because a strategy that does not fit your child, your household, or what you can sustain is a strategy you will abandon in a week and then feel worse about.
Related areas
Many parents working on their child’s behaviour are also navigating related experiences. The pages below cover the most common.
Ready to talk?
Every new client starts with a free 15-minute phone call. We talk about what is going on, what you are hoping for, and whether we are the right fit. No paperwork. No pressure.